More on Introverts

Do you believe any of the following statements?

1 – Introverts don’t like to talk.
2 – Introverts are shy.
3 – Introverts are rude.
4 – Introverts don’t like people.
5 – Introverts don’t like to go out in public.
6 – Introverts always want to be alone.
7 – Introverts are weird.
8 – Introverts are aloof nerds.
9 – Introverts don’t know how to relax and have fun.
10 – Introverts can fix themselves and become Extroverts.      

None of these are true. 

Being a world famous introvert myself, I found the above list of introvert myths from Carl Kingdom quite helpful. Read the whole article and remember that all the introverts in your life are just like you - only different.

Exceptional Post on Introverts

Being one of the world's leading introverts I found Thom Rainer's post on The Introverted Leader exceptional. The following is just a wee quote:

Small talk drains introverts. We weird people often wonder why people ask us how we’re doing. We can’t stand to be captured by a stranger or casual acquaintance that wants to tell us how we can make the world a better place to live. We dread being placed at a dinner table where we are expected to carry the conversation. We do not like being the center of attention. To the contrary, a lone corner of a room with no one noticing us suits us just fine.

I have often been perceived to be unfriendly because of my introversion. It’s a fair accusation. I do not have a gregarious outwardly friendly personality. But I am deeply loyal to friends and family. Still I do need to work on my appearance of unfriendliness.

If the above describes you to any degree I suggest you read Rainer's suggestion's to compensate for your introversion. I found them helpful and wise. Thanks Dr. Rainer.

On Being an Introvert

Adam McHugh's blog on introversion is always an enjoyable read as was his book. His post yesterday was especially thoughtful. In part he states, From a neurological point of view, introverts have more brain activity and brain blood flow than extroverts, and we have less tolerance for the dopamine that is released from social interactions and activity. So in many cases it actually may be more pleasurable - in terms of the good feelings released in the brain - for us to be alone or at home than it is for us to be at a party or a church activity. In other words, we are more motivated to be alone than to be in a crowd. It's not that we don't like people or are anti-social or standoffish, it's that it actually feels better for us to be alone sometimes. Reading a book on a Friday night may feel better than a night out with friends, especially when we have spent the week in a socially charged atmosphere at work. You see, it's not that we don't like people or that we're naval-gazers, we just don't get our energy from being around others. Rather, we recharge our internal batteries by being alone and pursuing whatever our sometimes overly active brains would have for us to cogitate upon. Read the rest of Adam's thoughtful post here and think about all of your introverted friends. His last paragraph is particularly discerning. Let me know what you think.

A Brief Review of "Introverts in the Church"

Introverts in the Church: Finding Our Place in an Extroverted Culture is one of the best books I have read all year. The fact that I am an introvert may have something to do with it, perhaps. Or, perhaps not. Adam McHugh does the church and introverts a service with this work by delving into what makes an introvert tick. He first outlines where introversion differs from extroversion and explains how introverts are often not the people they appear to be outwardly. He dispels many of the myths that we have of ourselves and those of the extroverts in our lives. One of the most important facts he brings to light is that healing for the Christian introvert...is never found in aloneness, but is found in relationship to another. Our individualistic culture encourages us to find our identity in defining ourselves apart from others: who we are is how we are different from other people. But for Christians, personal identity is relational. We define ourselves in relationship to Christ: who we are is how we relate to him. The Son, sent by the Father, lives in us through the Holy Spirit, and we can't truly meet ourselves until we meet him.

McHugh then weaves his way through several chapters to explain how introverts are affected and misunderstood in many areas of life. Chapters on community, leading, evangelism and the church delve into how introverts see themselves and how they may respond Biblically while maintaining their uniqueness as introverts. Extroverts would do well to read and apply what McHugh outlines here so that they may better relate to the introverts in their lives.

One warning, there are several pages where the author strays from what I believe to Biblical and normal for us all regardless of our personalities. In the chapter on evangelism he seems to suggest that there are other non-verbal ways to share the gospel that would make the introvert more at ease. I think it is very plain that we must use words to explain the beauty of the gospel. Mere expressions such as an art sculpture will not suffice. Our God is a god of words and we must use them to explain him. Again, in the chapter in the church, McHugh suggests other ways of worshiping besides what Scripture instructs. Nevertheless, don't let these small drawbacks keep you from reading this very instructive and informative book.

I highly recommend this work to you. Whether you are an introvert yourself or an extrovert who may be struggling to understand the introverts around you & in your church, this book is a must read.